Trust is probably the most fragile thing in the world. One blow, aimed correctly, and it shatters, completely falls apart. Easily broken, not so easily repaired. Destroyed in a certain way and the results are not unlike those associated with death: coldness, emptiness, pain past anything you could have imagined, the wish to disappear. There are poems, art, songs dedicated to these feelings, to the breakdown of trust. Betrayal.
It’s deep. It seems worse when there’s an attachment between two people, some kind of connection that you accept with blind faith because it seems like the right thing to do. Letting that fall apart once and then thinking you can fix it is bad enough, but letting it happen twice? You feel stupid for the first time, for giving someone piece of you, a piece of you that isn’t very big but that is still big enough to destroy you. You know you shouldn’t give it back and more but it seems like it’s a good idea, you think that you can fix what broke before you that things will be okay because you want them to be and you’ll work and you learnt from last time.
You’re wrong. Never give someone something that they broke the first time round. Never give them the power to destroy you when they did it once before. And when you ignore all of these things get out before they destroy you a second time. Because if you thought the first time was bad, the second time hurts a hell of a lot more.
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